Nonsense

the house was so big that i’d always go outside in fear that silent anger would smother the residents. my voice stayed just above a whisper as i wandered around the grass talking to myself about a guy who had no idea he’d been on my radar and it was okay because my plan was for it to stay that way cause my radar is way over my own head. one day stupid emotions turned my mouth into a broken damn just long enough to let him know. sometimes i wonder what would have happened if id have said nothing and left the gazes alone to be just another two pairs of wandering eyes. think oprah said forgiveness and moving on is about accepting things that happened can’t be different. you can’t go back and change them or even wish to really. there’s more to it than that of course. i’d gone on a long uphill walk accidentally but was grateful for the motivational track i’d chosen. it was just enough to keep me going up when my heart rate got too high and i contemplated rolling down to return to where i’d started. she’s right though; there’s nothing to be found by going back to a place that has no power to change where you’ve already gone, unless of course you believe in heaven.